Just the words Abortion Grief Recovery may stir powerful emotions. They may include feelings of shame, regret or self-punishment, thinking you don’t deserve to grieve or heal because of the choice that was made or clinging to hope that recovery is possible. Whatever your frame of mind, there is comfort in knowing you are not alone.
I have yet to meet a woman that said she hoped to one day get an abortion, yet 24% of women have experienced one or more by the time they are 45, states Guttamacher institute. Some of the many reasons women have abortions include pressure or coercion, lack of support or finances, difficult relationship, abuse, and the justifications build up until the choice is made and that chapter is written into your life.
Following the abortion procedure, some may feel temporary relief that the pregnancy is over, but feelings of confusion, sadness, anger, regret and despair may begin to subtly take hold. These emotions may come immediately after or years later and are difficult to identify in relation to the past abortion.
Abortion involves loss: loss of a child, loss of expectations, loss of a relationship, and each of these losses deserve and need to be grieved. Too often women feel alone, as if they need to keep that chapter of their life buried. As time passes, the weight of the secret develops into emotional numbing and self-blame, affecting relationships and personal mental health. Maybe you were told “it’s not that big of a deal” or “it’s the right thing,” and are now confused why you’re struggling, not knowing that your decision could result in such deep heartache. That can lead to feelings of isolation and loneliness due to fear of rejection or what others might think or say.
I pray that you know you are not alone. You are not crazy. I understand because I have been there. Hope, redemption, and forgiveness is possible. We can grieve our loss and find God’s love, forgiveness, restoration, and transformation. Our silence, secrets, and hiding only keep us bound to the pain and lies. Yet God has so much more for us! He is a forgiving God, so much so that he sent HIS only son, Jesus, to come and die for OUR sins (John 3:16). God knew we were going to choose abortion before we did, He grieved that himself, yet he still loves us the same before, during, and after (Hebrews 13:8). His love is one we cannot fathom. A love that forgives quickly (Colossians 3:13). He is able to turn our ashes into something beautiful and our despair into a spirit of praise (Isaiah 61:3). He will walk along beside us as we heal and grieve the loss of our babies and give us strength (Deuteronomy 31:6). He takes what Satan meant for harm and uses it for good (Genesis 50:20). He turns our darkness into light (Psalm 18:28).
I invite you to attend an abortion grief recovery class, to walk with women and learn to process and grieve the aftermath of abortion. You are not alone. I found so much support and encouragement with this class and developed a stronger relationship with Christ. I no longer live harboring secrets by allowing my testimony for God to use. That freedom is from God and you can experience his love as well. No matter what your story is or what your circumstances may be, you are always welcome. Contact agr@choicesclinic.net for more information.
